Tuesday, September 16, 2008

Because it's THE LAW! 2

The more I read, the better it gets. Gotta love that old testament.

Deuteronomy 22.8 When you build a new house, be sure to put a railing around the edge of the roof. Then you will not be responsible if someone falls off and is killed.

Deuteronomy 23.1 No man who has been castrated or whose penis has been cut off may be included among the Lord's people.


Deuteronomy 21.10-14 When the Lord your God gives you victory in battle and you take prisoners, you may see among them a beautiful woman that you like and want to marry. Take her to your home, where she will shave her head, cut her fingernails, and change her clothes. She is to stay in your home and mourn for her parents for a month; after that, you may marry her. Later, if you no longer want her, you are to let her go free. Since you forced her to have intercourse with you, you cannot treat her as a slave and sell her.

Deuteronomy 21.18-21 Suppose someone has a son who is stubborn and rebellious, a son who will not obey his parents, even though they punish him. His parents are to take him before the leaders of the town where he lives and make him stand trial. They are to say to them, "Our son is stubborn and rebellious and refuses to obey us; he wastes money and is a drunkard." Then the men of the city are to stone him to death, and so you will get rid of this evil. Everyone in Israel will hear what has happened and will be afraid.


Deuteronomy 22.28 Suppose a man is caught raping a young woman who is not engaged. He is to pay her father the bride price of fifty pieces of silver, and she is to become his wife, because he forced her to have intercourse with him. He can never divorce her for as long as he lives.

2 comments:

precarious balance said...

Holy crap dude. You gotta stop or the townspeople might stone you to death.

I'm not even going to analyze this one. It's too obvious.

Just one thing - do you suppose that if there was an addendum put on it today, it would have, "If a fast food restaurant makes coffee, it mustn't be made too hot so the restaurant cannot be held responsible when some infidel spills it in his lap."

strangeloop said...

Yes, of course. God is here for us. Also we might see something like 'When having a yard sale, mark all uneven surfaces with 'watch your step' signs.'

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